The last few years have been very intense for many reasons, and can be made even more so when dealing with a turbulent social, family, or romantic dynamic. Sometimes these dynamics are caused by circumstance, miscommunications, or simply spending a little too much time together in quarantine. The list goes on! But for some, and in much more alarming and frustrating situations- it can be caused by an energetic leech.
How do you know if you are dealing with an energetic leech? It is true that people who are codependent, or “fixers” are often very attracted to energetic leeches. Do you feel the need to walk on eggshells around someone? Are you finding it difficult to have alone time without guilt or fear of repercussions? Have you lost your sense of self? Are you constantly feeling tired, drained, depressed, or anxious in any of your relationships? Does this person disregard your feelings?
It is true that energetic leeches are not always without hope (such as a narcissist or, god forbid, a sociopath). Sometimes, energetic leeches can take the form of someone with unresolved or unrecognized trauma, who does not (and may never) understand how they are harming you. In some hopeful situations, an energetic leech may even be in the process of morphing out of this toxic behavior.
Quite frankly, it doesn’t matter. It is common that we simply cannot tell which situation we are dealing with. We may never learn why, and it isn’t important to our own highest good. Whatever situation you may find yourself in, always take the necessary measures to ensure your physical, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing.
You cannot fix anyone- you can only help yourself. Read that twice. Hell, read it a hundred times if you need to.
Now that we have gone over a few of the intricacies- what on earth can be done?
Today we are going to outline a very useful, easy, and effective ritual called cord cutting. This can be done once you are no longer in contact with someone who has caused you harm, or to separate yourself from a toxic version of a relationship or person. There are many other situations that this ritual can also be applied to as well, so feel free to revise it as necessary with your highest good in mind! Please note that this ritual is never done with intent to harm, and often requires a great amount of self reflection, as well.
This is my own personal version of a cord cutting ritual, and I am sharing the most simple and accessible option. You may make it more intricate with physical items or representations if that helps you. You can do it more than once. Use your intuition, and do what feels right.
Find a comfortable and private place where you can relax without fear of distraction. Feel free to do this in a salt bath for added cleansing benefit, if you so choose. It is best to use actual salt (himalayan, dead sea, etc.) as epsom salt is not a true salt, and does not have the same metaphysical cleansing properties.
Close your eyes, and picture a cord between yourself and whoever you wish to stop sending your energy to. This cord can be any color, texture, material, etc. that seems most appropriate to you. Acknowledge the energy draining from you through this cord.
As you are picturing this connecting cord- it is very important not to send any negativity between yourself and the person you are energetically connected to, though we understand that can be very difficult! Send them a thank you for the role they had in your life, the lessons they helped you to learn, or excuse them from your life with love, light, and healing. Meditate on that for as long as you need to.
When you are ready, picture a pair of scissors or any other sharp object that you can use to cut this connection. Take a calming deep breath, and imagine yourself cutting the cord. Observe both halves of the cord and all energy returning to their rightful owners. Feel yourself healing as you are no longer depleted of energy, contaminated by their energy, and can now move on without the constant drain and strain to your energetic being. Feel satisfied and rejuvenated with a new sense of independence, self, healing, and wholeness.
*Violence and abuse in any relationship is never an excusable behavior. If you find yourself fearing for your safety and need resources, the number for the National Domestic Violence Hotline is (800) 799-SAFE (7299) and their website is thehotline.org.
Author: Taylor Erickson