The Path of Why - Developing Your Personal Style

honeypot path of why personal style

Personal Style

So today I want to talk to you about something that is a passionate subject for most people, whether they feel like they DO have a very developed sense of style or whether they feel like they DO NOT. Your sense of style is completely individual to you and there is no right or wrong. There are no rules. there are no limits. Style is something that you create, it does not define you, you define it. What's exciting, is that it's totally possible to create a vibrant wardrobe and sense of style by working with what you naturally respond to. And everybody responds to different things in different ways things - like shapes, color, size, pattern and more. So it truly is completely individual. The things that I like aren't right or wrong. The things that you like aren't right or wrong. They just are. And that makes the whole thing so beautiful. Because it removes us from any negative cattiness, jealousy, backbiting. There's no need to ever say that someone else's style is stupid and that yours is awesome.


One of my goals with these blogs, and with my business, is help you to feel totally confident in your own sense of style. Some of you already rocking your style - so that is le awesome. For you, there will still be fun ideas, and tricks for you to play with. And really playing is key. But for those of you who feel like you need a little help, these tips and tricks will be a total gold mine.


I’d like to share with you today a way of thinking that I like to call the Path of Whys.  It's a common technique that's used in a lot of other Industries. But I really like to use it in conjunction with my sense of style. And you will see exactly why it's so useful in just a minute.


Now keep in mind this can go for any sense of inspiration any object any piece of artwork any outfit anything that you could possibly see in nature or anything. This way of thinking can also help you develop ANY creative endeavor, and can be used for self help, too.


So your challenge from ME is this: I want you to go through out the next day or even just kind of walk around wherever you are right now and see if you can spot something, and find something that you visually like. A lot. Something that makes you feel lit up inside. Something that makes you feel a Deep sense of yes. That's step number one. Feel free to post it on my fb page with the phrase: THIS IS WHAT I LOVE: and the hashtag, if you want, #pathofwhy.



Now I want you to really take a look at that thing. Whatever it might be. But I'm going to use flowers as an example. First I want you to think about it if you can as contrasted with other similar things. What I mean by that is if you're looking at an orchid think about why you like it more than other types of flowers. If you're looking at a building, why you like that Building compared to other buildings. That's your first why. Your first why can be based on anything, from it makes me feel happy to it feels around. 2 I like the way the orchids different on the top then on the bottom. It could be that you like the color it could be that you like the size of it. It could be that you like the way it looks smooth or soft or jagged.


Now, I'm going to have you ask why again. Just like a little kid. This is totally why we, as little kids kept saying why, why, why?  Children have a lot to teach us about learning. They learn things in a very short period of time at an exponential rate. And you can too. So let's take the orchid example again. Maybe you liked that the shape of it was rounded.  The next step is to ask yourself why that appeals to you. Maybe it just does and you just tend to gravitate toward really rounded shape in art. Maybe your face is round shaped, and you love that about yourself. It could be anything. So now that you know the second Y, which is in this case going to be that you just love round shape in general and life and in art, then you're going to ask why again.


So the third why is going to get deeper. You’re drilling down into the why into your understanding of your experience of life. This is what makes it deep. Get deep get into your feelings.So your next why might be something like  I love round shapes because they feel comforting and warm and maternal. So that's your third why.


You can go on with the “whys” as long as you want, because let me tell you, it can be a really fascinating Rabbit Hole. Sometimes they can make you uncomfortable. And that's okay. Sometimes it can bring you a huge amount of joy, and that's good too. Sometimes it can do both.


After you feel done with all the whys for any reason (just feel done, uncomfortable, bored, happy with result - ANY reason), then I'm going to have you do the next step. Really, the steps never end, it's more like a lifestyle and thinking change than a three step plan. But starting with the first steps helps you to get on your way. Continue to focus on it. And it will enrich your life so much - way more than just your sense of style.

The last step, or really this is more like a diving board as you jump into this big pool of goodness, is that you're going to start looking for the serendipitous appearance whatever it is that you felt that you loved looking during this exercise, as you go through your next days. You're going to start looking for round shape that you love. You're going to start noticing round shapes that you don't love and drilling down into why you do or don't love them. When you get to the “why” you will begin to understand yourself more deeply, and how you relate to Art in the world. And that is where a deep sense of style comes from. Now, to some of you this might just be common sense. There are a few people who do this on a really deep level without ever having been trained, or having to consciously focus on it. These are the people that already have a beautiful, deep sense of style, and for whatever reason their life has led them to it naturally. For the rest of us, much of the time, we're told that these things are stupid, not important, it doesn't matter what we like or want, or that we should look like this or that in order to be a good person. All those things, and more, keep us from noticing what we actually are drawn to. They keep us from being authentic. In finding your authentic self, and your authentic response to the world around you, is all your sense of style develops.

So now I challenge you for the next three days, first thing in the morning, think to yourself, “what am I going to find today? What gorgeous, exciting things am I going to find out in the world that inspire me today, and how will I find them, and through whom? What beautiful shapes, colors, and ideas are going to come into my path?” And really be looking for those and expecting them to come to you. And you will notice that your life is suddenly filled with this huge unending flow of beauty. And a deeper understanding of yourself as well, which is where art comes from in us, and  also what art brings to us.

 


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